“To be lost is to be fully present, and to be fully present is to be capable of being in uncertainty and mystery”
Often when I lay in my bed and read, I rearrange my body so that my head is where my feet usually rest so I may look out my window and gaze at the canvas outside.
Weather is a strong reminder that every day is unpredictable and strangely beautiful. Although being a Peace Corps volunteer may sound more exotic or more full of more hardships than “normal life,” I would challenge that assumption.
Every day is unpredictable no matter where you are in the world. The clouds remind me of this.
Yet, it’s easy to forget or disregard the truth of impermanence. Many a day feels the same, and so my mind wanders elsewhere, wishing to be elsewhere, no longer present to the subtle beauties around me, dreaming of what was and what could be, instead of appreciating what is.
I remind myself that a year ago, I lay dreaming and pining for this opprotunity, to be here, in Thailand. Now, here I am, at my intended destination yet still caught in the endless cycle of dissatisfaction and craving that I thought would be quenched.
It is when we embrace the mystery of the moment, set aside our preconceived notions or ways of being and seek to become lost in our now, it is then that we are fully present to the wonders available in each second of life.
Whenever my mind seeks to predict what the clouds will do next or starts to reminisce in other skies seen in the past, I remind myself just to observe what I see, get lost in the present moment. No day is like the one I am experiencing today.
“That thing, the nature of which is totally unknown to you, is usually what you need to find, and finding it is a matter of getting lost.”
Books in queue to read:
A Field Guide to Getting Lost by Rebecca Solnit (quotes above)
The Geography of Bliss by Eric Weiner
The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle
Sapiens and Homo Deus by Yuval Noah Harari
A Life of One’s Own by Marion Milner
Braving the Wilderness by Brene Brown